With the impending purchase of the Twitter.com service by an evil billionaire with a fourth grade education, I have decided to rethink how I communicate with listeners on the World Wide Web, a.k.a. the Dubba-Dubba-Double-You-Double-You-Double-You. It seems most prudent that I do so by increasing my attention to this Substack-powered publishing platform formerly known as the Whatever Happened to Pizza at McDonald’s? Newsletter.

I say “formerly known” because in the near future this space will be “re-branded” simply as PizzaAtMcDonalds.com and will be the primary online destination for my listeners, followers, and sycophants. You may already see that there is a link at the top of this page labeled “Useful Links”. This link contains links to other areas of the Dubba-Dubba-Double-You-Double-You-Double-You, a.k.a. the DDDYDYDY, of interest to those interested in my investigation. And the posts that I will be posting here with much more regularity will contain much of the same interesting information I have previously published on my Twitter feed.

By way of example, here is a fascinating McDonald’s Pizza television advertisement I recently encountered. Note that it features quite detailed images of the revolutionary oven McDonald’s developed to bake pizzas in record time (a record time, I might add, that almost no person in their right mind could possibly accuse of being “too long”).

Intriguing, to say the least.

Recently, a children’s book author named John Green tweeted a Tweet expressing his admiration for the way children’s music creator Taylor Swift “fosters community”. By that, I believe he meant her ability to convince her fans that they are in a parasocial relationship with her, thus triggering an emotion-motivated compulsion in them to provide a steady revenue stream. My definition of community is somewhat different, but I hope this Substack-powered internet destination will serve to foster it all the same. I encourage readers to leave questions or comments at their discretion, and I will participate in these discussions where appropriate.

My hope is that this will become something more significant than a simple newsletter and instead a premiere forum for education, entertainment, solemn prayer, and other basic human needs. I have several exciting announcements to announce quite soon and hope everyone reading this will join me in celebrating them when the time comes.

Thank you for your attention. You may now continue going about your business.